Returning Home
by Erika
Summary: After an almost disastrous mission, QuiGon and ObiWan return home and share some time together.


**_Title_**: Returning Home

**_Author_**: Erika

**_Rating_**: PG

**_Summary_**: After an almost disastrous mission, Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan return home and share some time together.

**_Time Frame_**: Aside from the fact that it takes place after all of the JA books so far, it doesn't really matter…but I guess if you have to know Obi-Wan is 17.

**_Spoilers_**: Maybe, if there are, they are for JA.

**_Category_**: Angst, H/C, non-slash, and MUSH ALERT!!!!!!!! 

**_Disclaimers_**: The Star Wars universe and all of its characters belong to George Lucas, I'm only borrowing them to have a little fun and I promise to return them unharmed (well, at least mostly unharmed). I'm making no money off of this and this is written for entertainment purposes only.

**_Feedback_**: Yes, please!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! On or off-list is fine. (firedrake88@yahoo.com)

**_Archive_**: Jedi Apprentice, Early Years, and anyone who has my first FIC (Something Worth Fighting For, which is, by the way, completely unrelated to this one so it doesn't matter if you haven't read it, or don't remember it). Anyone else who wants this, please ask and send me a link to your site so that I can check it out : - )

**_Special Thanks To_**: My beta reader, Adi-Ser, thanks soooooo very much, I really appreciate it! Also, this is probably gonna sound really weird, but anyway, whatever. I was reading "Denial" when I got this idea, and even though I don't think it's related in any way, I'd like to thank Obi the Kid for the inspiration. Isn't it funny how that stuff works?????

Things in 's are telepathic communication through the Master/Padawan bond.

Returning Home

Obi-Wan Kenobi stood at the doorway of his room, looking around as if it were some foreign place, a place not his own. It had been almost an entire year since the last time he and his Master had been at the Temple. Their last mission had been so unexpectedly grueling that Obi-Wan found that even the familiarity of their quarters could not make him feel quite as relaxed as they once had. He sighed heavily as he entered his room and set his pack down on his bed. Despite the fact that things seemed different he was still weak from the incident on Treilkeis and it _was_ good to be back. 

"Glad to be back?" Obi-Wan heard Qui-Gon ask from behind him and turned around to see his Master standing in the doorway, leaning slightly against the frame.

Obi-Wan looked down, "Yes, Master," he said softly. Qui-Gon was known for being one of those Jedi Masters that lived 'in the field' and they hardly ever actually spent time at the Temple. Obi-Wan loved being his Padawan and wouldn't trade his place in Qui-Gon's life for anything in the galaxy. Yet, he missed his friends and often found himself wishing his Master wouldn't always take every mission the Council offered him. Obi-Wan however, didn't want his Master to think he didn't enjoy their missions together and therefore never said anything. He didn't want to disappoint him.

Hearing a regretful sigh from his Master, Obi-Wan realized that his relief and exhaustion must have been evident in his voice and quickly began to apologize. "I'm sorry…Mas–"

"Obi-Wan," Qui-Gon cut him off, "don't. I know it has been hard for you, always running around from one end of the galaxy to the other, and I'm sorry. We are home now, Padawan, and I have requested that the Council not send us on any missions for the next two months. We both need time to recuperate our energy, especially after what happened on Treilkeis. I…I want to spend some time with you that doesn't involve diplomatic negotiations, or trying to prevent a planet from going to war."

Obi-Wan was so surprised and happy that he didn't know what to say. He was pleased that he would finally get some time off and hopefully be able to see some of his old friends, but, he was even more thrilled that Qui-Gon actually wanted to spend time with him. It shocked him, really. Qui-Gon had never before suggested anything of the sort, and the only time they had actually been together when not a mission was when he had been on probation. Obi-Wan smiled tentatively and looked up at his Master, still speechless.

"Oh, Padawan…is it truly so surprising that I want to spend time with you? Have I been that cold?" Qui-Gon's voice was wistful and held such great sadness in it that it almost brought tears to Obi-Wan's eyes. His Master's face, which was usually devoid of any emotion, now reflected the same regret that the Padawan had heard in his voice, and his eyes shown with sadness and…love.

Obi-Wan was about to answer when Qui-Gon suddenly shook his head and his stoic Jedi Master mask replaced the previous emotion. "Why don't you take a shower while I make some dinner?"

Disappointed to see Qui-Gon's control so strictly in place again, Obi-Wan nodded his agreement and slowly headed to the 'fresher to do as his Master had bid him. Finding the warm water extremely relaxing and comforting to his sore muscles and tired body, Obi-Wan took a much longer shower than he expected and by the time he was finished Qui-Gon had already finished making dinner for them.

"There you are," Qui-Gon said when Obi-Wan finally emerged from the shower; "I was beginning to think I was going to have to go in there and rescue you."

Obi-Wan felt his checks flush slightly and looked down at the floor, "I'm sorry, Master, it was just so relax–"

"Padawan, hush," Qui-Gon said softly, "I was only joking. It's alright, I understand. You have nothing to be sorry for, you were just taking a shower."

Chagrined, Obi-Wan kept his gaze fixed on the floor. He had been Qui-Gon's apprentice for four years now, and he _still_ couldn't tell when his Master was joking or being serious. "I'm sorry that I couldn't help you make dinner…" Obi-Wan said softly, still feeling shamed.

"Obi-Wan…don't–" Qui-Gon was going to tell Obi-Wan not to apologize, but instead decided to simply say, "It was my pleasure to make you dinner, Obi-Wan, and it would be an even greater pleasure if you would eat with me." Concerned, Qui-Gon watched his Padawan's emotions swirl around from embarrassment, to joy, and then confusion. Inwardly, the Jedi Master sighed. He had never realized how cold he was towards his Padawan until he had almost lost him on Treilkeis. Now that he knew how much the boy meant to him, he intended to show Obi-Wan that he cared for him deeply. The boy however, seemed so surprised by even the slightest attempt that Qui-Gon made to get close to him that it made his heart ache. 

A small, extremely shy, smile appeared on the teenager's face and he nodded slightly, "It would be my pleasure, Master."

Qui-Gon smiled also, "Why don't you sit down and I'll serve you?" He gestured toward the already-set table, indicating that Obi-Wan should be seated.

The boy looked up, startled, and said, "But I should serve you…"

The Master sighed, "Obi-Wan, sit down and let me serve you dinner. Not every tradition needs to be followed," Qui-Gon winced slightly as the words came out slightly harsher than he had intended, and hoping to prevent any hurt feelings on his Padawan's part he quickly added, "It was a very difficult mission, especially for you. You nearly lost your life. I think you're entitled to simply relax for a little while. I made dinner, and I will serve it to you."

Obi-Wan's startled look faded to one of complete confusion. "Yes, Master…thank you," he said as he sat down at the table and waited for Qui-Gon to join him. 

Almost half the dinner passed in complete silence as Obi-Wan tried to figure out why his Master was acting so differently and Qui-Gon tried to figure out how to initiate a conversation that wouldn't confuse or surprise his Padawan. Finally, he realized that with the way he had been acting towards Obi-Wan it would be impossible and settled on, "I took the liberty of checking to see how many of your friends are at the Temple and I'm sure that you'll be pleased to know that Bant is here, as well as Siri."

Obi-Wan looked up at Qui-Gon, who had managed to surprise him for the millionth time that night and stuttered, "Th-thank you, Master."

"After you rest for a week," he continued, almost as if Obi-Wan hadn't spoken, "I am going to suspend all of our lessons for at least a few days so that you can spend time with them."

If the boy had been surprised before, now he was shocked, if not astounded. "I…I am most grateful for you kindness, Master," he replied formally, not knowing what else to say, "Thank you."

Qui-Gon sighed, "You don't need to be so formal with me, Obi-Wan, it isn't necessary. I am your Master, yes, but I am also your friend."

Obi-Wan smiled again, the same small, shy smile he often used when around his Master, "I am glad that you consider me to be your friend," he said, his voice unusually thick with emotion and joy.

~~~~~~~~~~

After dinner Obi-Wan helped Qui-Gon clean the table and wash the dishes and then prepared to go to sleep early. Despite his weariness, he felt happier than he had ever remembered feeling. Qui-Gon was finally treating his as more than just his apprentice, he was showing his Padawan the kindness of a friend and even seemed to be opening up to him a little bit. All of this made the boy extremely content and happy. 

He had always wanted to be close to his Master, but it seemed that whenever they got _too_ close, Qui-Gon would push him away. Now it was Qui-Gon who was drawing Obi-Wan in, and that made all the difference in the world to the seventeen-year-old boy who longed to prove himself to his Master.

"Obi-Wan?" Qui-Gon called from the entrance on the boy's room.

Obi-Wan turned around and gave the man a shy half-smile before responding, "Yes, Master?"

"Going to bed already?" 

"Yes Master," Obi-Wan paused for a moment before he jumped into explaining himself, "It was a long flight home and I am very tired…"

For the third time that night, Qui-Gon interrupted his Padawan before he could get carried away in his explanations and apologies, "Obi-Wan…Padawan, I was merely asking. I know that you are tired and I know that you are still weak from the wounds you suffered on our last mission. You don't need to explain it to me. It does not make you weak; it only makes you mortal, just like everyone else. Jedi are not infallible and we, just like everyone else, need to take some time off every once in a while too."

Obi-Wan nodded, not knowing what to say. 

"Would you like me to tuck you in, Padawan?"

The Padawan's mouth practically fell open at his Master's offer. It had been _years_ since he had been 'tucked in' by anyone, and the last time had been when he was a small child in the crèche. _Qui_-_Gon_, his Master, had certainly never 'tucked him in'. Instead of making Obi-Wan feel like a small child again, the offer filled the boy with a rush of pleasure. "I-I would like that very much, Master," he said timidly.

"Alright, then call me when you are ready to go to sleep," Qui-Gon said as he turned to leave the room.

Afraid that the spell that had been cast over his Master would somehow vanish, leaving the cold man he had grown to know so well, Obi-Wan almost frantically called after him, "Wait!"

Concerned, Qui-Gon immediately turned and approached his Padawan, "Yes, Obi-Wan, is something wrong?"

The boy immediately shook his head no, "No, Master, don't…don't go."

"Are you ready now?"

Obi-Wan looked around the room. He had planned to do a couple of other things before going to bed, but he was almost afraid to let this offer go. Being tucked in by someone might not seem like a big deal to someone else, but to Obi-Wan it meant that his Master cared about him, and that was more important to the boy than anything else could be. "Yes, Master."

Qui-Gon nodded and gestured for the boy to get in his bed and smiled at the eagerness with which the boy so hastily complied. "Slow down, Obi-Wan, I'm not going anywhere," he said, seating himself on the side of the boy's bed once it was obvious that Obi-Wan was comfortably settled under the halfway drawn-up covers.

The boy was startled, again, when his Master reached out with a gentle hand and caressed his cheek softly. Before Qui-Gon could draw his hand away, Obi-Wan grabbed it and suddenly blurted out, "Master, can I ask you a question?" Recently the boy had been very shy with his Master, but the way in which his Master had treated him that night made him bold and longed to know the answer to his question.

"Of course," Qui-Gon said, gently squeezing the hand that had taken his own, "you can always ask me questions, and talk to me, never feel that you cannot."

"I…I was wondering...were you scared on Treilkeis?"

Although he didn't show it, and to Obi-Wan his expression was all but unreadable, Qui-Gon was surprised by this question. His first reaction was to remind Obi-Wan that fear lead to the darkside, but the boy's earnest expression made him realize that complete honesty was required. "Yes, Obi-Wan, I was scared."

The boy's eyes widened but when he spoke, his voice did not tremble. "So was I. I was afraid that we would not be able to stop the Treilkeians from going to war and that millions of lives would be lost."

Qui-Gon nodded slowly before responding, "Do you want to know what I was afraid of?"

Obi-Wan nodded immediately.

"I wasn't scared that we wouldn't be able to avoid the war, for I knew from the beginning that we would be able to prevent that…I was afraid of losing you, my Padawan."

The hand that held Qui-Gon's trembled slightly at this admission, "You were what?"

"I was afraid that I would lose you…and that you would never know how much you mean to me. When you were lost in that terrible storm and we found your companions dead…I thought that I had lost you to the Force. I couldn't feel you through our bond…and I was scared that you had left me without realizing how important you are to me."

Now Obi-Wan's hand was shaking even more and when Qui-Gon met the boy's eyes, he saw that they had welled up with tears. They were not tears off sorrow though, they were tears of joy. "I…I–" Obi-Wan tried to speak, but the words would not come. Finally he gave up on forming the words, and instead he used their bond. I love you, Master.

Qui-Gon reached out with his other hand and wiped away one of Obi-Wan's tears as it ran down his face and answered, I love you too, my precious son. Along with the message, he also sent waves of love and support to the boy that had so persistently taken over his life and stolen away a piece of his heart.

Upon hearing, for the first time since he had known Qui-Gon, that he was loved and feeling all of the love that was overflowing their bond, more tears filled the boy's blue-green eyes and flowed down his cheeks. He tried to fight the tears and regain his composure, but it was useless, and when Qui-Gon reached out with his arms, Obi-Wan gladly crept into them and snuggled close to his Master's protective warmth.

Slowly and gently the Jedi Master rocked his Padawan back and forth in his arms, whispering softly in his ear and stroking his hair in a calming rhythm. It's alright to cry, Padawan. It's okay, just let it all go.

Obi-Wan's tears flowed faster now, especially knowing that he wasn't disappointing his Master, and soon he was all but sobbing in his Master's tunic. The strange thing was that he wasn't sad. He was so overwhelmingly happy that all the pent-up emotion about impressing his Master was finally too much for him that he had to give himself over to this catharsis of tears. 

I'm proud of you, Obi-Wan, and I love you. Even though it often seems that it's not true, and even though I am cold towards you, never forget how much you mean to me, never forget that you are my life and my son.

For what seemed an eternity, Qui-Gon just held the trembling boy and poured out all his love into their bond. When he thought that Obi-Wan was in a deep enough sleep, he used the Force to ensure that he would not wake up as Qui-Gon settled him back down on the bed. Then he hesitated momentarily before he stretched out beside the boy and took him into his arms again.

I'm finally home, Master, the boy said, waking up momentarily to show Qui-Gon how peaceful he felt by sending his emotions back through their bond.

Qui-Gon received these emotions with a smile and returned them, Yes, my son, we are finally home.

The End


End file.
